The Noob/Purist’s guide to the Green pastures of Mangalore.

The Noobs/Purists guide to marijuana before

“This is a blessing of nature. It will soon become a burnt offering. And then we shall be rewarded for our curiosity.”

– random stoner in Kankanady

So your new to Mangaluru eh? Well, you are in for a wild ride. Fuck what you read about it on MakeMyTrip or Wikipedia. Or whatever you heard from your relatives back at home or in the Gulf, in church or wherever. You have no clue what this little coastal city has to offer.

I’m guessing you are a student. Late teens. Acne still visible in the process of fading from your face. Got into some Medical college, want to save some lives maybe or cure cancer. Or maybe you’re a descendant of Archimedes and in all your wisdom you chose engineering. It’s cool, been there done that.

Stupid Teenagers

Some Justin Beiber/Miley Cirus looking muthafuckas.

 And you want to smoke pot? It’s fine if you don’t. You can still read this and broaden the limited, narrow minded perspective that you cherish with your misplaced sense of self-righteousness. Wokay, here we go!

 

THE #GREEN SCENE IN MANGALORE

To obtain Cannabis in Mangalore you need to master the art of  “Scoring” or know someone who does. The act of paying money in exchange for grass is colloquially referred to as scoring. The score is the grass you get. Cannabis can be scored from whoever sells it, though buying it from whoever sells it is not advised for obvious reasons (person who sells may rip you off if he don’t know you or he/she may be a cop/informant/harami).

Quantity and quality of the green varies from peddler to peddler. If your lucky you may get a good deal on both quality and quantity or if the law steps up the heat you may get little/bad quality/spiked or you may have to run dry.

Terms used to indicate  the quality of grass available/imported to this region are:

Mango: Name comes from the smell of this type of grass. It has a slight smell of mangoes. This is good stuff.

Killer: Slang term indicating good shit.

Sagar/Mysore/Idukki/MM Hills/Manali: These are places which have a reputation of producing some of the best grass that comes to streets of Mangalore.

Spiked Also known as “laced” weed. This is synthetic cannabis or cannabis which has been deliberately adulterated with other substances to boost the high. Usually done by peddlers to give greater highs with smaller amounts of cannabis therefore increasing  their profit margins and paap. The added substances can be nasty stuff like herbicides or rat poison and there have been rumors of traces of battery acid being found in spiked weed.  Spiked is harmful and though you may be trippin ballz on some types, it can cause headaches, lung infections and other nasty shit you don’t need. Do not smoke it.

Trippy Shit: Trippy Shit.

James Franco tripping balls on trippy shit.

Fhut gayi. Siyo ge?

How does the Cannabis come to Mangalore?

Cannabis is trafficked into Mangalore disguised as vegetables in trucks or as dirty laundry in student’s backpacks and various other means that crazy mothafuckas can think off.

How is it distributed?

The same way groceries are. The shipment comes from the farmers to the dealers , who then sell it to the middle man in large quantities, who then sells it to the peddlers.  The peddlers sell it to consumers. Some dealers may not have a middle man and so sell it directly to the peddlers. Quantity is the largest and the cost per unit is cheapest when directly obtained from the farmers. Quantity sold decreases as it goes down the chain of dealers, peddlers and middlemen and the price increases as the green lantern is passed to more intermediate hands before it is sold to the consumer.

Stoners who use the services of a peddler regularly may received discounts/surplus quantity, in other words you get consistently good deals as trust builds. The peddler may then introduce you to his dealer and you get better deals and become closer to the source.

Legal status of the Ganja babe in Mangalore

As per the laws of India under the NDPS Act, cultivation/production/manufacture, possession, sale, purchase, transport, storage, consumption or distribution of Cannabis, except for medical and scientific purposes and as per the rules or orders and conditions of licences that may be issued, is illegal.

Managlore Police

Mangalore Police

This simply means that if you get caught by the cops, you will either just get off with a warning(rare) after they are done tripping on you or you may get locked up->lawyer->bail->parents came to know->fucked(not so rare) or if you suck at citizen’s duties you may slide the hand, that carries an amount (appropriate to the offense starting at INR 500 to INR 50,000, could be more if you happen to be a NRI with a big mouth), under the table and straight into the dirty cop’s vagina(most probable). These scenarios may not apply if you’re the offspring of an influential government employee without a conscience or you are filthy rich.

Who are the consumers?

People from all walks of life smoke pot. In Mangalore, most of  the grass is consumed by the youth population – mainly students and the future of this nation. Many of these students study in the numerous engineering colleges here. Sadly, majority of the population that indulges is male.

Joint Engineering

Joint Engineering

That’s all for now folks. In the next posts I will detail the complexities of tripping balls and also give you an insight into the wonders and perils of going green in Mangalore.

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